Dead Pirates & Other News

While I don't think much of Barak Obama's foreign policy, I will give him credit on the Somali hostage situation. Bullets to the head pretty much ended that hijacking. Now, I find it hard to believe that Obama really approved the actual operation as claimed. As in, he told the Navy to shoot them in the head if they had a shot. In fact, it makes more sense that he only allowed action if the captain was in imminent danger. Which seems like it should have been standard operating procedure. But at least he did allow them to shoot pirates if they were going to shoot the captain. And to be honest, I'm just glad that for once an American President can have third world thugs gunned down without criticism. I can only imagine what would have happened under a recent administration.

But if Obama is going to take the credit for the successful operation, I expect a lot more from him now. To begin with, put the only bastard you caught in jail for life. No plea bargains. And if he's acquitted (he will be tried in NYC), drop him off where he was captured. From a plane. Don't be like Canada who captured a bunch and let them go (that'll show 'em). Actually, there are two things that need to be done. Attack them before they get to sea. They know what ports they use. Blockade the ports, and if you see any boat coming from Somalia with guns, sink it. That's how the Royal Navy ended piracy in the Caribbean. Or how about arming the ships? These guys are in speedboats. Do you think they'll keep coming if you blast them with a .50 caliber machine gun?

Now is it fair to be suspect of Obama's foreign policy decisions? Maybe. Let's see, he reacts to a North Korean missile test by asking the UN for more sanctions in addition to the ones that North Korea had been ignoring already. Blandly took a tongue lashing from tinpot dictators. He also lifted some economic restrictions on Cuba, and then thought Cuba might want to release some political prisoners. Silly me. Since lifting the restrictions could easily pour a lot of hard cash into Cuba, I would have thought about asking them to release them in exchange for lifting the restrictions. What incentive does Cuba have to do it now? Oh right, Obama asked them to. That'll work. But at least he is "deeply disappointed" that an American journalist has been jailed on trumped up charges. I imagine his response will be a sternly worded letter and a care package of smokes. Especially when his previous efforts with Iran seems to consist of asking the only pro-American country in the Middle East to capitulate to the demands of anti-American groups in order for the U.S. to help them keep from getting nuked by Iran. Almost makes you long for the days of Jimmy Carter's hard edged diplomacy.

But let's look at some other things. Like a prostitution story because we all like hooker tales. This one is a strange one. Woman breaks into an apartment. Demands the men there pay her for sex. Ten dollars. Which looking at the picture may be too much. They call the cops instead and she's charged with solicitation. I have to wonder if she'd done this a lot and they were just fed up. Calling the cops is such a hassle. There were three of them. Everyone chip in a few bucks and have one of them take one for the team.

A university in Taiwan is proving that the U.S. doesn't have the market cornered on silly, wasteful classes. They have a class to learn "how to appreciate and analyse porn movies." Not sure I'd want to sit in front of the guy who appreciates it too much. What's the deal with these classes? What do you analyze on this? "Look at his aim. Didn't get any in her eye." Give me a break. And why take it? It's not like it was during my college days when there was no internet porn. And one schmuck is worried what his parents will say if he does well in the class. I'd be more concerned with not doing well because they'll know he spent the whole semester spanking his monkey instead of analyzing.

And to prove I can defend Barak Obama, I will. Sure, I ridiculed him for giving the Prime Minister some DVDs as a gift. Especially when it was found they didn't work in England. But I don't have a problem with him giving the Queen of England an iPod. To begin with, the gift she gives everyone is pretty damned egotistical. An autographed picture in a silver frame? Is she that out of touch with reality that she thinks that's what everyone wants? I think Frank Drebin said it best.



And a sad death to report. Marilyn Chambers who probably caused several cases of teenage carpal tunnel syndrome has passed away. I clicked on the video. It wasn't what I was hoping for. She was looking bad. All used up and knockers almost on the floor (not often I think a female porn star needs to zip up her jacket). And apparently not doing all that well. She was found in her mobile home. So sad when a cultural icon falls on such hard times.

Some hack psychiatrist is suggesting that the recession may make us happier. I know I'm popping wood.

God, I wish I could play the guitar.

Did anyone see where the government is thinking that GM should go into bankruptcy? I'm so glad the feds loaned them all that money. If they were smart, they'd run an ad campaign around those loans. Tell Americans that by buying GM cars, they can help the company pay back the loans.

A 53 year old woman got busted for reckless driving when she was pulled over doing 103 mph. With her grandson in the car. Who she was teaching not to drive that fast. With those genetics, that kid probably can't remember anything. Still probably wasn't as bad as the Norwegian who got busted for driving 123 kph. While having sex with his girlfriend. The position sounds like reverse cowgirl. Wait a minute. That's not even 80 mph. Sad day in this world when you can't get your rocks off while doing about 75 mph.

When I first heard that Madonna fell off a horse, my first thought was wondering if she was strapped on underneath.

Maybe this should have been near the pirate story. Two people are dead. From a sword fight. In Indiana. Here is the line that says it all. "That escalated when one of the men grabbed a sword, prompting the other man to also brandish a sword." Are Hoosiers now walking around with swords in case they need to fight a duel?

Who among us hasn't passed out on the crapper after taking too many prescription drugs and washing them down with bourbon? And then let the 2 year old we were babysitting wander out into a alligator infested canal? Actually, that never happened to me. Nobody is stupid enough to let me babysit a 2 year old.

What is with people going to some wannabe doctor for plastic surgery? A couple of months ago it was silicone injections in the ass. Now, it's boob jobs. With vet equipment. How stupid can you be? You think getting a boob job from some guy working out of a dirty house with pets running around is a good idea? I'm going to pretend to be a plastic surgeon. Not to inject people with silicone because that sounds gross. I'll just do pre-op screening and feel around some.

Let's end this blog posting with a good boob story. The War on Flashing Boobies is continuing. But at least a lawyer is fighting back. When nightclub out in Denver had it's liquor license suspended because some bimbos were flashing their boobs while there, their attorney decided to fight it as a 1st Amendment case. I'm not sure the 1st Amendment should protect that, but I like the effort. And I think women should be able to make a statement by whipping out the goodies. In fact, if any woman feels like showing me her boobs at any time, I won't complain.