Catching Up On Risque Stories

As mentioned in the last posting, I haven't had time to update this so I have a long list of news stories that I haven't had a chance to get to. I'll start with the dirty ones.

I liked the result of this story because it establishes the legal precedent that staring at a woman's knockers doesn't constitute sexual harrassment. Not that I have to worry about such things as I would never engage in such unprofessional behavior. Unless she was stacked. Actually, I don't believe either of them. I don't believe the man stared because he had a medical condition that led to a wandering eye. However, I also don't believe her when she said it was so bad that she had to go change clothes during the day. If you knew he was going to stare and were that uncomfortable about it, don't wear something that lets you boobage hang out.

Now here's another story involving a lawsuit. A Canadian stripper is suing for age discrimination because she was let go when the club she was working at decided to go younger. Sorry. When it comes to a profession where appearance is so important, looking old can be a hindrance. So, it's not really age discrimination. It's looking aged. Sure, when a woman is rubbing her butt up against your crotch, you may not be looking for crow's feet around her eyes, but if you do see it, you may not go back. Unless that's what you're into.

With their scat porn, you would think Germany would have most of the European sexual dysfunction. Nope. France has prude nudists. I usually stay clear of nudist stories because most nudists are people I would prefer to see in clothes, but sometimes they are funny. A nudist hangout has had a rash of fires at swinger clubs, and it's being blamed on nudists who are offended by the swingers' behavior. I guess it's a difference of opinion on whether it's better to dangle it or pass it around.

At a Bills game a few weeks ago, a couple got busted for having sex in the women's restroom. I like how they termed it "inappropriate". My defense would be that there's been a lot of inappropriate behavior on the field by Buffalo the past few years. Actually, I've been to a lot of football games and that's not near as inappropriate as some behavior I've been exposed to. Someone took a massive dump at one of the Commonwealth Stadium bathrooms while I was there for a game, and the ventilation was bad. I thought I was going to die. In fact, when I ran into Joker Phillips at McCarthy's on St. Patrick's Day, I lodged a complaint with him about that. Tried to pass it off as not being his responsibility. Loser.

Disgraced former governor of New York, Dave ........I mean Eliot Spitzer, won't be charged for being a "john" to a overpriced whore. I like how the excuse not to charge him is that he didn't use public or campaign funds. Sorry, the Mann Act makes it illegal to take women across state lines for whoring. The federal government has a long history of making examples of high profile criminals to deter others from engaging in that behavior. Why does Spitzer get a pass?

Some church dude in England had to go to the hospital with a potato stuck in his ass. Great excuse. Naked curtain hanging followed by falling on a potato. Please. You need a better excuse than that. Just claim you lost a bar bet. Or you were hiding it because you thought the Irish were coming to steal your potatoes.

Also in England, a town councillor is resigning because she gets no respect from her fellow councillors due to the fact that she's also a stripper. Why is always the strippers that we must attack? Actually, looking at her picture, I'm sure she could quit. I don't think she's making that much money from it.

ARod's ex is pissed that he's dumping the children in order to spend Thanksgiving with Madonna. I'm not going to question his parenting because his kids are better off without him with that kind of judgment, but come on. Madonna has become gross. Screwing the turkey would probably be more fun.

And let's end with some school related stories. Beginning with a bus driver who offered some cheerleaders $40 to lift their shirts. How dumb was he? Don't proposition them en masse. Ask around and find out which ones are going to be willing to do it. Don't ask them in front of their more prudish friends. And make sure they're 18 so you don't have legal hassles. There are certain methods to being a pervert.

See, this guy is in trouble because he latched onto a 17 year old. He's a teacher who was messing around with a runaway who happened to be found in his closet. He told the police he didn't know where she was. He could be telling the truth. I don't know how those teenage girls ended up in my closet. Or who tied them up.

And finally, a former porn actress was found to be working as a teacher's aide at an elementary school. Some people think she should be fired because they want role models as employees, but since it wasn't illegal, the school board is worried about a lawsuit. Since it's an elementary school, I doubt she's going to try to enlist the students into the business. Plus, if elementary students know what she did previously, you got bigger issues. Now, what I found really funny about the story is that she pointed out that "our president-elect has admitted to doing crack". Even if she wasn't making a valid point, it would still be funny because of the way the reporter handled it. She felt it was important to point out that Barak Obama's admission was for cocaine, not specifically crack. Because admitting to using blow is no big deal, but that crack stuff would be a real problem.

Pittsburgh Trip

As mentioned before, I recently took a trip to Pittsburgh to watch Louisville play Pitt and the Steelers against the Colts. All the traveling has made it tough for me to keep up with the blog. Even though both teams lost, only one of them pissed me off. At least the Steelers played a good game. Louisville didn't do squat. Kind of reminds of the entire Louisville season. Still, the trip was fun. Pittsburgh is an interesting city, especially if you like hills and traffic problems. You know you have hills when your trolley runs up and down. Half the buildings are built on hillsides and seem to be about to fall off. I realize that a city its age with so many hills would have traffic problems, but I've never seen a place like this. If they had traffic engineers, those guys were on crack. Intersections were rarely perpendicular. They'd go off in odd directions. Streets would be one way until they became one way going the other way. Sometimes it'd be one way with a side lane going the other way, but only for buses. Or you'd be on a four lane interstate that had four exits at one time, but since another interstate is feeding into it, you have everyone in a Chinese fire drill trying to get into the proper lane. Even better were three way intersections that I ran into on side streets. The main road had the two stops signs. Alleys turning onto that road didn't. So, you have to stop if you're driving straight, but people making hard right turns got to go whenever they wanted. Interesting concept.

Now, in one way, the traffic patterns were fine. I got out of the stadium really easy for both games. Even with a full house for the Steelers, I was on the highway out of town 10 minutes after getting to my car. I did ask the guy next to me if it'd be a problem. He said I'd be fine since I was on the other side of the river. He said Steelers were good about knowing where to go after the game. The only problem being they're all drunk. That was the good part about where the stadium was. It was right on the river so you park on the other side and walk across a foot bridge to it. Except the bridge moved while people were on it. A lot. Now, there was a problem with the stadium being right on the river. It didn't matter how cold it was. The wind off the river made it colder. The air temperature wasn't that cold at either game. However, when the wind starts cutting through you, it becomes a bit uncomfortable. When you're losing, it really sucks.

The Louisville game was notable for one reason. Not that they quit when faced with a little adversity. I've seen that quite a bit this season. I was in one of the end zone sections and wanted to get a picture of UL's offense in scoring position. I had to settle for the one at the right because they only got into scoring position once. At the other end of the field. No, what got me was the most unnerving thing I've ever seen at a college football game. Keep in mind I have been to a game in Morgantown WV, but what Pitt fans did defied all logic and reason. Between the third and fourth quarter, their entire fanbase stood up and sang along to Neil Diamond's "Sweet Caroline". They even had the words on the jumbotron. I'm still not sure why they began doing it this year. Diamond isn't from Pittsburgh. The song has nothing to do with Pittsburgh or football. Still, they're going to their first bowl game in years. Maybe they're onto something. Maybe "Kentucky Woman" can be sung at UL games. Sure, some hardcore UK fans might object, but they can use "Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon" as long as they think it's about their sister.

The Steeler game was a lot better. They did lose in the end because their quarterback didn't want to protect the ball. But the atmosphere was much better. Granted, the fact that I was rooting for the home team in this one certainly made a difference. The Louisville section wasn't too happy for most of that game. Scoring seven points will do that. Steelers' fans were happy most of their game. Probably has to do with leading most of it. And the fact that most were drunk. The fans were pumped up though especially when the defense was on the field. They were loud and the towels were waving. Yet, they had an odd musical tradition too. They had a montage of defensive hits with the Styx song "Renegade" playing behind it. They went apeshit for it. Now, that's not a bad song. It's the only good Styx song (and no I did not forget "Mr Roboto) which means it came from Tommy Shaw. Still, just seems something wrong with using Styx to pump up the crowd.

But it wasn't all a pleasure trip. I also saw some educational sights. Like the Hooters in Huntington. Just kidding. No way do I stop in West Virginia. But I did go visit Fort Pitt which was right next to the stadium and was open on Sunday so I could tour it before the Steelers game. Fort Pitt was a military installation established by the French (then called Fort Duquesne) to protect the fur trade until the British captured it from the dirty Frenchman and renamed it. It had a nice demonstration on the fur trade and then I got to explain to a Belgian woman what all the people dressed in black and gold were there for. On the way back, I also stopped at Fort Necessity which was built byGeorge Washington while serving in the British army on an expedition that helped start the French and Indian War after his men shot a bunch of dirty Frenchmen. The fort has been rebuilt which was obviously needed after you look at it. My boy scout troop could have built something like this so it wasn't going to last over 250 years. It was rebuilt in a field that you had to walk from the visitor's center through a forest to get to. I was about a half mile from my car taking a picture from the far side of it when I realized I was wearing a light pullover, no hat or gloves and it was snowing. You begin to realize why most historical sightseeing is done in the summer.

Veterans' Day

I used this for Memorial Day where it does fit better, but as the son, grandson, brother and nephew of veterans, I think it's also important to remember the service men and women who made it back. Their sacrifice should not be forgotten either. Plus, I really like it so I'm using it again.