The Ski Trip & Other Things

The Ski Trip is next weekend. Hopefully that will satisfy Phil as I talk about other things.

Way behind on a lot of things. Always get that way during football season. And probably other reasons that kept me busy. But not anything like naughty websites, social networks or heavy drinking. I don't do any of those. Now time to catch up with a lot of old crap and such.

Let's start with the fact that I'm writing this with the Pro Bowl on behind me. What the Hell is the NFL thinking by scheduling the Pro Bowl the week before the Super Bowl? The idea is to make it more relevant. Great idea. I thought having it only a week after the Super Bowl was dumb because so many players from the Super Bowl dropped out due to getting the Hell knocked out of them in that game. This precludes any Super Bowl player from being in the game at all. And a lot of players from the conference championship games will now drop out too. So, that's how you end up with Tony Romo, David Garrard and Vince Young at quarterback and Peyton Manning, Drew Brees and Brett Favre watching the game. That'll make it more relevant.

Oooh. Super Bowl. This is a study in contrasts on fan bases. You have the staid and boring fans of New Orleans versus the wild, crazy and (in a lot of cases) downright criminal ones from New Orleans. There will be rioting in Hoosierland if the Colts win. Or something like that. The teams are somewhat similar although no on the Colts has said they will marry a Kardashian if they win (and the guy who made that list has no credibility if he thinks Kim Kardashian is rated ahead of Gisele Bundchen). Big edge to the Colts in that category since they won't have a player with incentive to throw the game. This is tough game for me to call. Initially, I was going with the Colts. Their defense had done fairly well in the playoffs and they had a real shot at an undefeated regular season. But the Ravens and Jets didn't have real juggernaut offenses. Arizona did, and New Orleans stopped them cold. Not that they were that good all year on defense, but the Colts weren't either. I'm picking the Saints because they can run the ball, and Reggie Bush dicked around against the Vikings and they still won. Besides, maybe he thinks a girl famous for a sex tape with some two bit rapper (I'm only assuming since I have no idea who he is) is a keeper because she has a really big ass.

Someone asked me if I watched the State of the Union address last week. Yeah, right. I don't watch that when someone I voted for is giving it. You can read it the next day. Besides, it was on a Wednesday and that's all-you-can-eat wing night at Hooters. Priorities, man. But it's all blather anyway. Good things are all my doing. Bad things aren't my fault. If the news is bad, pretend it's good. Blah blah blah. Now, going back to an old story on our exalted leader, unlike a lot of conservatives, I must say I wasn't all that upset that Barack Obama won the Noble Peace Prize. Did I think he deserved it? Of course not. He hasn't done anything as President to deserve that. That'd be like Colt McCoy being given the Heisman based on expectations. Actually, that's not correct either. McCoy had actually done things in previous years for those expectations. I can't remember if Obama has ever actually held a job. Now, do I think it was humbling for him? Of course not. Nothing humbles a narcissist.

No, the reason I think the awarding is much ado over nothing is that the Nobel Peace Prize is much ado over nothing. Look at the list. A bunch of people you've never heard of. A long line of serial incompetents (Jimmy Carter and Kofi Annan in back to back years? Does it get any more inept?). It's amazing to me that there is any prestige attached to this award when you see how it's decided. The award committee is made up of five people. Five people. Not just five people. Five people representing five political parties in the Norwegian Parliament. The most prestigious foreign policy prize is decided by five political hacks from a country smaller than Colorado? The Olympic table tennis bronze medal should be more prestigious.

How is it possible that Ford Motor Company turned a profit in the 4th quarter? They didn't get taken over by the government or half sold to their own union. How odd that Ford could make a profit. Hmmmmmm. Maybe the government getting heavily involved in the auto industry wasn't good. Who could have seen that?

Of course, not is all well in the Ford universe. After all, they are introducing cars that is Twitter enabled. Are you effing kidding me? If you're buying a car because you can listen to tweets on it, you don't just have too much time on your hands. You need help.

I'm in the wrong line of work. Some guy goes around to the off track betting places and picks up discarded tickets out of the trash and checks to see if someone threw away a winner. And makes $45,000 a year. Granted, it sounds like he's in New York and that is less than a grade school janitor makes, but it's still quite a bit. I would think he'd have better luck at the track where people are drunk and staring at college girls in summer dresses with their boobs hanging. Now that's why I'm there, but I always run my tickets through the machine before tossing them even if it was on a horse they ended up shooting on the track. To be honest, I couldn't do what this guy does. If I found a winner, I would place another bet instead of cashing the tickets.

There is a rumor going around that I don't like the Black Eyed Peas. That's not true. I despise the Black Eyed Peas. A computer program could write their stupid, repetitive songs. This was a group going nowhere until they added some skank to be the eye candy and then took off. Well, joke is on their fans. Fergie has a penis. So if you're a man who likes the Black Eyed Peas, you must like trannies.

Back to politics. Big news story. Massachusetts (I think this is a county in Vermont) just had a special election for the recently deceased Ted Kennedy's Senate seat. Scott Brown won. By 5 points. He was a Republican. The bluest of the blue states just elected a Republican to a seat that had been held by a Kennedy (or Kennedy flunky until Ted was old enough to run) since 1953. Oh , and Obama had gone there to campaign for the Democratic candidate, Martha Coakley. This was great fun for me. Watching all the news channels, the spin why he won was awesome. I saw one Democratic strategist say Brown won because voters in Massachusetts were mad that there wasn't a public option in the health care bill. Which means they voted for the candidate that opposed the public option (Brown) over the candidate in favor of it (Coakley) because they wanted it. Even Chris Matthews found something wrong with that. He's probably smart enough to know that calling a big block of voters "stupid" may not be the best strategy. My other favorite spin was that Coakley was just a bad candidate. This was the White House spin since they couldn't fathom his policies being a root cause. Was Coakley a bad candidate? Sure. She was an idiot. But let's be serious. Massachusetts is not a swing state like Ohio or Pennsylvania where being a bad candidate can lose. This was a high turnout for a special election. People don't turn out to vote against a bad candidate. They stay home. This is a state with only 10% of registered voters having an "R" after their name. Scott Brown was a complete unknown state-wide running against a former attorney general. Unknowns don't cause people to come out and vote. Again, this is Massachusetts. In 1996, William Weld was the best Republican candidate (name and money wise) for Senate in years. He lost to John Kerry by 8 points. This is Massachusetts. Only 10% of their state legislature is Republican. Special election or not, a liberal Democrat does not lose a Senate seat there due to being a bad candidate.

Ick. A British couple is earning enough money from starring in porno movies to pay for a wedding in Cancun. I'm not opposed to people using porn to make money. My problem is that this is an unattractive couple, and I think it's giving porn a bad name when people will pay to watch these two get it on.

Speaking of porn, scientists wanted to find out how men in their 20s differed based on whether they watched porn or not. The study couldn't be completed due to a lack of men in their 20s who had not watched porn. Are these researchers unaware how easy it is to find porn on the internet?

Oh, and I never got around to the Tiger Woods sex scandal. Personally, I don't watch golf and normally wouldn't care. However, once the mistress count got really high, I began paying attention. The guy just picked the wrong sport. If he played in the NBA, that number would seem low. But he plays golf. That expects a straight laced image. I saw a rumor that he was at some sex addiction clinic. What a scam. He wasn't addicted to sex. He could just afford it. I think the most amazing part of the story was the range of mistresses. Cougars, hostesses, porn stars, hookers and a Perkins waitress. A Perkins waitress? Are you effing kidding me? You're worth hundreds of millions and you're picking up chicks who work at Perkins?