Baltimore Ravens at Tennessee Titans
My first thought was that the Titans should handle this game easily. To begin with, they won in Baltimore earlier in the season. The Ravens' offense has a tendency to fold against good defenses. Tennessee has a good defense. Then I started thinking that Baltimore really does have a shot. They've got a really good defense too. Tennessee doesn't have much of a passing game and Baltimore could sell out the run. They've only lost two games since week 7. Of course, the only decent teams they beat were Miami and Philly when Philly had its collective head up its ass. They lost to the only good teams they played - Steelers and Giants. I'm going with the Titans. They spanked the Steelers in their last meaningful game of the season and I heard Ed Reed didn't practice Wednesday for the Ravens. If he's out or even gimpy, that is a killer for their defense.
In non-football related sports news, Charles Barkley got his ass arrested for a DUI. That's not that big of a story. He doesn't play anymore and I don't watch much NBA analysis. The story becomes good when you see the police report. He was pulled over for running a stop sign. His excuse was that he was picking up a girl for a BJ because she gave the best ones around. Now, how genius is that? To begin with, I'm pretty sure he's still married, so why would you want an official police report to mention that you're not only picking up a woman for oral sex, but you're picking up her up because she gave you a good one last week? And considering you're picking her up off the street, I'm thinking she might be a hooker so is telling the police that smart? And finally, does he think there is a BJ exception to traffic laws? That as long as it's good oral sex that you're running stop signs for, it's okay? I'm going to look this one up.
Speaking of improper penis talk, Kathy Griffith took some heat (or would have if anyone had really been watching) for ripping a heckler and then saying "You know, I don't go to your job and knock the dick out of your mouth." Now, I was personally offended. Not by the language, but as someone with a sense of humor, I was offended that CNN insisted on labeling her a comedienne when she's not funny. I was also offended that she couldn't think of anything more up to date than. I'm pretty sure Andrew Dice Clay used it back in the 80s, and I know it was a long time ago that I saw this clip of another comedian using it (before hitting someone with a guitar).
Arizona Cardinals at Carolina Panthers
I don't have to say much about this one. For all their faults, picking Arizona to win last week wasn't really hard because they were a much better home team and going against a rookie quarterback. This week they are on the road. At Carolina which is on the east coast and where they lost in week 8. Arizona played five games in states touching the Atlantic Ocean. They lost all five by a combined 202-102. I'd like to see Arizona win, but I don't see it happening. Take the Panthers.
Some controversy in Germany right now. Apparently they have a rat problem in Berlin. No, not Tom Cruise filming there. He's left. Real rats who are running all over the place. One politician came up with a solution to pay homeless people to kill the rats. Now, as someone who has had pet rats, I like rats. However, there's a difference between domesticated rats and nasty sewer rats much like there is between a wild dog or your average leg-humping pet. I had to laugh at the article where it was stated that it was "inhuman" to have poor people killing rats? How stupid is that? We pay people all the time to kill rats. They're called exterminators. Is it inhuman to employ them? Besides, if they're on the government dole, they should be pulling their weight better. Granted, I wouldn't be too keen on seeing this nation's homeless bums running around with shovels trying to whack rats while suffering the effects of rotgut liquor and schizophrenia. Still, there would be a lot of entertainment value in watching that. I'll leave my opinion on this uncertain.
From rats to beaver. A woman is suing her ex lover for sending naked pictures of her to her mother. I'm not saying the guy isn't a cad, but she took the pictures of herself using his cell phone. Sorry, if you're dumb enough to use his phone to take pictures of yourself, don't act surprised when bad things happen after your breakup. And breaking his phone doesn't help. But to be perfectly honest, I just posted the story because she plays in the Lingerie Football league and it had pictures.
From beaver to bad beaver. A Canadian man (which explains so much) got AIDS from his ex-wife and now is saying other men she slept with should get tested. His ex-wife is a Thai stripper. She was working as one for almost a decade. That she picked up AIDS seems to have surprised him. She's a Thai sex worker. He was lucky he didn't find out she had a wang when she got there.
Philadelphia Eagles at New York Giants
These two teams split the regular season with both teams winning on the road. Both games were close. The Giants certainly seem to be the better team, but my guess is the Eagles were the last team they wanted to see because they know each other so well. Brandon Jacobs should be back so that's huge for the Giants. Still, the Eagles are picking things up. The Giants did rise up and beat the Panthers in week 16, but they finished the season losing 3 of their last 4. I'm just not sold on the Giants winning it all without having a big target like Plaxico Burress. Eli Shi.....Manning looks lost at times without him (and ugly all the time). This game seems like as good as any to pick their upset so I'm taking the Eagles.
What is it about Disney and chicks wanting to whip out their knockers? You already had the whole show 'em on Splash Mountain. Now I find out that they fired some guys portraying Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean because women were flashing their breasts at them. Actually, since they aren't really Johnny Depp, I'm not really believing that's happening all that much. And even if it was Johnny Depp, get a grip people, he's from Owensboro. It ain't that exciting. But I may just go down and see if I can get the person dressed as Ariel fired by flashing my junk at her. Or the one in Minnie Mouse.
This is a cheery story. A guy calls in a heart attack in England. The EMTs show up, see how "untidy" his place is and let him die because it wasn't worth the effort to save him. We know this because they weren't smart enough to realize the phone was still on an open line. Guy living alone in a messy place? Remind me never to move to there. Gee, a country with socialized medicine and people question whether someone deserves to die on the floor rather than get treatment? Who would have thought that? Besides me. And some others.
Another health related story from England that doesn't involve letting people die. An interracial couple had a set of twins, and one looked black and one looked white. Not completely uncommon since they were fraternal twins and one can get dominant genetics from one parent while the other child gets it from the other. Which I assume the article mentioned, but I didn't really read it. However, the story gets a lot less common because they did again. Two sets of fraternal twins with different genetic pigmentation? That is not common at all. Statistically, it's seems highly unlikely. Since I prefer to think the worst of people (I really don't, but people expect me to), I did some research. It's possible for a woman to have fraternal twins with different fathers. I'm not saying that Mom was sleeping around here, but if I was the daddy, I'd start asking what she was doing the morning of conception.
San Diego Charger at Pittsburgh Steelers
I'm pretty sure that anyone who knows me knows that I will never pick against the Pittsburgh Steelers. I'm not even going into detail why the future 2009 Super Bowl champions will beat the hosers from the left coast.
Let's do a couple of Why Johnny Can't Read stories. This story came out awhile back and it should kill any misconceptions that public universities are defenders of free thought rather than bastions of political correctness. A student at IUPUI takes a job as a janitor at the school to help pay for his education. He was charged with racial harassment by the school for reading an anti-KKK book on his own time because he read it in front of co-workers who were, let's just say for argument's sake, overly sensitive. Defenders of the guy keep making the argument that since it was an anti-Klan book, that it was okay for him to read it. That's some BS right there. It doesn't matter what or why he was reading. Reading a book about the Klan doesn't make you a bigot. I still own a copy of the Communist Manifesto from when I was in college. I don't think anyone would believe I am a communist even if I claimed to be. But that doesn’t matter anyway. He could be a wannabe Klansman and it would be irrelevant. He was on his break. He wasn’t engaging in Klan activities. He was reading a friggin’ book. It’s beyond belief that a center of learning would try to censor what their employees read on personal time. Actually, it’s not beyond belief because universities are havens for politically correct intolerance.
The Chicago public schools are trying to clean up their act. Apparently they've been spending money without oversight and doing other crap, but I want to focus on the cappuccino machines. They bought 30 of them for schools. For $67,000. Even though they weren't requested. Here is my problem. The inspector general is unhappy for two reasons. They spread it between several schools to keep from getting bids. And it was $12,000 more than if they had gotten competitive bids. WTF? He's not even asking the right questions. One, why do schools need a cappuccino machine? They're coffee pots. Two, you can get them at Walmart (unless you're Phil or the Divines) for a few hundred bucks. They paid over $2200, but they could have only paid $1800 for a coffee pot with a steamer on it. That $55,000 they think they should have paid is still more than the median household income in the U.S.. And it was for 30 coffee pots. Fiscal sanity is still paying five times as much? And yet, school systems are wondering why they don't have any money. Here's a good idea. Let's make the head of Chicago Public Schools the new Secretary of Education. What could go wrong there?
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