Sex Change For Kids & Other Stories

Here's a story that proves that having a medical degree doesn't necessarily mean you have any damned sense at all. A pediatrician at the (soon-to-be-not-all-that) respected Boston's Children Hospital is offering to treat children as young as 7 if they think they are the wrong sex. Basically, he wants to dope them up so they don't hit puberty. Brilliant. First off, I may not have children, but I've been around them. I wouldn't trust them to decide what juice box they want with their lunch. I certainly wouldn't take their word for what gender they want to be. We're talking about the age group that asks for the most expensive present in the store for Christmas, but then dumps it 20 minutes after opening it because they want to play with the box the new dishwasher came in. Second, I've said before that sex change operations are garbage. This is the result of a mental problem. If you've got a headcase on your hands, fix the friggin' noggin. A massive surgical operation is not really the best way to treat something. They don't amputate limbs because some schmuck decides he really doesn't need his legs. They probably will eventually, because we've become a society that doesn't want to admit that someone is nutjob.

Speaking of nutjobs, I'm still trying to guess what happened here. A man was found dead by the side of a dirt road. He had cobra bites on his leg and cheek. He had a dead cobra in his hand which he apparently had chewed on a bit. Oh, and he was wearing a condom that he had not done his business in yet. Authorities are baffled. What's scary is the least strangest possibility is the guy was about to get busy with a street whore, got bit by a passing snake and decided to take it into death with him. Strangest possibility? I'm not real sure how you have sex with a cobra, but it's probably not a good idea.

I was watching a recording of my favorite news program Red Eye. It was from some day within the past week. One of the guests was Hal Sparks who had a Charles Manson hairdo and was promoting a VH1 show called Celebracadabra which seeks to find out who is the "Best Celebrity Magician". I'm not going to get into the issue of whether VH1 is guilty of false advertising for saying Sparks is a celebrity or the fact that he's listed as a comedian (my definition of comedian is that you should be somewhat funny). Nor am I going to mention just how stupid the show sounds. I'm just going to mention that Sparks became involved in a discussion on the Belmont where he accused Big Brown of being incredibly inbred which he claimed that he knew all about because he was from Kentucky and knew about inbreeding. Oh, but never fear, Hal said he left because wasn't inbred enough to stay or something to that affect. I must say Sparks is one of the more embarrassing exports the state of Kentucky has produced in recent years. And remember, we produced Wynonna and Billy Ray Cyrus' soul patch (and at one point, his mullet).

And another Red Eye related moment, host Greg Gutfeld took issue with the two guys in New York who climbed the New York Times building. Gutfeld took issue with the fact that only one was taken into custody while the other was let go. Piss on that. I take issue with the fact that emergency workers were waiting at the top of the building to help them in. Why should they have to risk their lives for these losers? You want to make a spectacle of yourself by climbing a tall building, fine. Now, get your own ass down. You might fall? That's why God gave us spatulas.

There's a group of people out on the west coast, primarily Seattle (of course), that are going through dumpsters for their groceries. They call themselves Freegans. I stick my regular connotation that if you eat out of a dumpster, you are a bum. I think what gets me is the smugness factor of people who are eating out of the trash. At the moment, I'm leaning towards wishing Listeria on them, but I may eventually get to the point I wish Salmonella. Hey, trash eaters, try the tomatoes.

I do not, nor have I ever, lived in Fort Walton Beach. And I could come up with a much better excuse for the cops.

A marriage therapist in England has declared that adultery can be a good thing for marriage. Now, I freely admit that I have violent psychological reactions to betrayals (which I really can't discuss in detail) so maybe I'm alone in finding this theory to be very stupid. Now, in this idiot woman's defense, she does admit you should never let your spouse know about these affairs because it can cause "damage". You think? Some cases have caused homicide. One thing the article didn't mention was the marital status of the therapist. It used the term "Ms." which doesn't indicate whether she's married or not. My guess is that she isn't, because if she is and her husband read her book, his imagination is probably running wild with questions why his wife feels the need to write a whole book saying adultery can be OK. Or else he's running off to the nearest harlot with his pants at half mast because he thinks he's been given a free pass.

I'm sorta watching the NBA Finals game tonight. I have it on, but I really don't care who wins. I hate Kobe Bryant so I don't want the Lakers to win. I hate Boston fans (biggest whining pussies out there) and don't like anyone on the team, so I don't want them to win. The biggest NBA story isn't the Finals. It's a newly convicted referee/gambler who is claiming that a lot of games were fixed by the NBA, and not just by him who was in hock to a bunch mob connected bookies. Well, I'm not going to call him a liar, but he's just trying to get out of more jail time for failure to pay restitution. Actually, one of the things not in his favor for me is that the games he brings up were ones that were already considered corrupt by basketball fans. The 2002 Western Conference Finals? Who needed a former ref (who didn't work the game) to tell me something wasn't kosher about that one when the Lakers had 27 free throws in the fourth quarter alone? Damn, if I had reffed that game and did it clean, I would probably admit to fixing it because I would rather people think I was corrupt rather than that incompetent. This is why Phil Jackson complaining about foul disparities in Game 2 of this year's Finals was so laughable. Looks different from the other side, doesn't it Phil? The NBA's had a bad reputation for a long time about the belief that refs favor certain teams (home teams, big market) or players (stars). Why are these allegations such a big deal? Did anyone else really believe the Finals would include teams other than LA and Boston this year?

I really don't try to educate people here. Most are adults and beyond hope. However, if you are stalking a woman and like to send video of yourself spanking the monkey to her cell phone, it's best to know if she's at the police station before you send it.

Who says you can't find great info from sports stories? I stumbled across a website about the best restrooms in America in a story about Jerome Bettis' restaurant restrooms. I would ridicule the fact that someone set up a website to rate America's bathrooms, but look at what I write about. But what I found was that one of the Hall of Fame restrooms is one I've been in. Well, not exactly that one. I don't think the men's room at Oxmoor Center in Louisville is that nice. Plus, I usually go to the Mall of St. Mathews which is just down the street. Both have an Sbarro, but Mall of St. Mathews also has a Cinnabon. On the down side, I once ran into Walt at Mall of St Mathews. I kid. I liked Walt just fine.

I mentioned before that the biggest problem that I have with Barak Obama (besides the obvious socialism that he's advocating) is that his supporters have deified him which I find creepy as Hell. The latest is Jesse Jackson Jr. (Jesse Jackson Sr.'s legitimate son) who actually said after Obama clinched his coronation..........I mean nomination, "the event is so extraordinary that another chapter could be added to the Bible to chronicle its significance." Well, at least he didn't go overboard in his praise of the moment.

Of course, I find this part of the fringe (actually mainstream) that is becoming the norm in the Democratic party. Some wackjobs planning on making some noise at the Democratic convention are concerned over the possiblity that their activities will be broken up by a "brown note" weapon. In full disclosure, the Brown Note episode of South Park was the final straw that caused me to stop watching the show (not the Brown Note part, but the part where Mr. Garrison felt unloved because his father never molested him). I could make a point that the activist group should fear the Brown Note (which doesn't exist) because they are so full of $hit, but that's too easy. Instead, I'll just point out that hippies like this probably eat too much fiber on their gay-ass vegan diets so loose stool is a definite drawback to a normal life.

And in another case of an activist I don't care a lick about, some left wing nutjob Truther is holding a one man hunger strike outside John McCain's hometown office until McCain like talks to him or something. I do have to give him some credit for consistent belief when he claims that Popular Mechanics is in on the vast conspiracy. Still, he's a stupid bastard and I'm angry that McCain agreed to meet with him. I have no problem letting these morons die off one by one.

And finally, a stripper story. Thought you could get away without one, didn't you? In Canada, there is a problem where they don't have enough strippers. The blame is being placed on the government issuing too few immigration visas to Romanian strippers. Now, I don't know too much about the problems of Canadian strip joints. Or Canadians in general. Such silly, useless people. However, if the internet has taught me anything, women from former Eastern European Communist dictatorships are freaks. Get all of them you can.