News Of The Week

Some dude gets charged with murder in his wife's death. How was the investigation described by the paper? "Almost from the beginning, investigators called her death suspicious." Really? She was shot in the head, and "almost from the beginning", the cops thought it might be suspicious. That's some good investigative work there. I just want to know what the cops thought before they decided it was suspicious. "We thought it was a heart attack until we noticed she had a bullet hole in her head. Then we became a little suspicious."

I always get a laugh at the morons who "fall" for prisoners. How many stupid women are going to marry death row inmates in this country? Of course, at least they hook with up with some guy who will likely never get out (and most death rows don't allow conjugal visits). But in England, this dingy broad brought home a guy she met on a prison visit. Then he stuck a knife to her throat. Gee, you take home a Satanic convicted rapist. What could go wrong?

As a Republican who isn't a big fan of John McCain because I felt he spent the last eight years opposing the rest of his political career in an effort to curry favor with major newpaper editorial pages, it is quite amusing to watch his media buddies at the New York Times turn on him so quickly now that he's the de facto nominee. The first story was a doozie. It was 10 years old. The only insinuation of an affair is that a couple of anonymous sources thought McCain was too close with a lobbyist. So, go ahead and run with that part prominently displayed. And even better, they were working on this story at the same time they were endorsing him. It's pretty bad when The New Republic and US News & World Report both consider it shoddy journalism. It's really bad when the Times' own ombudsman (who has a reputation for rubber stamping anything the Times does) tears the story apart.

Actually, while the McCain-might-boning-a-lobbyist article was retarded, it has nothing on the latest McCain hit piece. They're actually arguing that it's possible that McCain might not be eligible to take office because the Constitution says on "natural born" citizens can be President (ironic to see the Times suggesting an original intent Constitutional argument) and he was born in Panama while his naval father was stationed there. I don't care what "experts" they throw up there. The whole argument that someone born to military personnel stationed overseas is ineligible to be President is ludicrous. What kind of douchebag would actually take McCain to court and say a decorated war hero can't be President because his father served his country for 40 years?

Ironically, many think it will help McCain with conservatives as any enemy of the the NY Times is the enemy of conservatives (although allegations of adultery, influence peddling and being a foreigner might hurt with other groups). Speaking of conservatives, I was sad to see William F. Buckley Jr passed away. I wonder if Phil dislikes him more for mainstreaming conservative political thought or what he said about the Beatles. Actually, I subscribe to National Review and I wasn't aware of the quote until I saw it in an obit, so Phil probably just hates him for conservative political thought.

And for Phil - Movie Trivia - What actor/actress did Alfred Hitchcock believe looked too old in one of his movie to the point that Hitchcock blamed that person for the commercial failure of the film and never collaborated with him/her again?

What's the world coming to when a man can't get trashed while staying at a casino resort (on his company's dime) and call the front desk for a hooker without getting fired? The guy was in Iowa. What else is there to do in Iowa? Besides, what kind of resort doesn't have access to hookers? Then they were surprised when the hotel staff went to request he stop calling for hookers, he showed up nekkid. Well, he was waiting on a hooker.

Actually, hotel rooms can get people in trouble. A teacher's aide in Pittsburgh was fired from her job after being caught in a hotel room with a bunch of teenagers, some pot, possibly some crack, some beer and used condoms. Her excuse that they just showed up, but she didn't let them drink sounds a little hollow. Her protestations that she didn't have sex with them, but they might have "discreetly" bumped nasties with each other is a little far fetched too. How do you have "discreet" sex in a Clarion Hotel room with a bunch of other people there? Also, most teenagers are about as discreet as monkeys flinging feces. It gets better. Even before this incident, there were rumors at the school she was carrying on with her son's friends. She acknowledges this little episode "will only fuel those rumors." You think? You have a 15 year old son already being teased about your whore-like behavior and you're going to put yourself in this situation? Here's a thought. Grow the Hell up.

Amazing how indifferent some people can be about their kids. I also get so sick of people treating their kids like a prop. A woman in Florida threw a 3 grand birthday party for her one year old. She said "she wanted to make it memorable for her first child" and "I want him to know how important and special I think he is". I call BS on that one. Who remembers anything from their first birthday? This day was all about Mom. She wants people to realize how "special" she is. I think she's a needy bitch.

Speaking of someone a little too needy of attention. Congress has sent a note to the Justice Dept to investigate whether Roger Clemens lied in his sworn testimony. Yes, I will be beating this story to death. As I stated last week, I don't think the DOJ will go anywhere with it. However, I've got to love how stupid his attorney is when he says things like "Now we are done with the circus of public opinion, and we are moving into the courtroom. Thankfully, we are now about to enter an arena where there are rules and people can be held properly accountable for outrageous statements." Yeah, that was a great goal this legal team had. Getting indicted for perjury. Especially since he's the only player being investigated for what was in the Mitchell report. Good job. I bet ole Roger wishes he'd just kept his mouth shut.

Also on the needy front, a survey found that Mac users were self-centered snobs compared to PC users. Never saw those results coming.

In other crime news, we had one guy who drove to the police station to demand his drug money back. In a stolen car. And another guy has to have his DUI hearing put off. Because he showed up drunk. I guess some people don't think ahead when they visit the authorities.

More movie trivia - who played Handsome Stranger and Charming Jones in a '70s western?

A casting company in Pittsburgh put out a call for a white trash horror movie. In an incredibly intelligent move, they specifically wanted people with inbred hilljack features like you might find in West Virginia. Shockingly, the person who planned the casting call has been fired. I don't know why she felt the need to advertise for hilljacks. Most of them can't read anyway. Just go hang around the Morgantown Walmart. You'll find all the inbred mountain trash that you want.

I had seen the commercials for some new show where people are attached to a lie detector and get money based on how well they do. I didn't watch it. Watching people make asses about themselves is not my cup of tea. At least when they are on TV. However, I did read an article about a recent one. A woman went on the show with her husband in the audience, and freely admits it was for the money. She passed the lie detector test when she admitted that she had a habit of cheating on her husband, and when she also admitted she wished she had married someone else. Her Achilles heel? She flunked when she was asked if she was a good person and said "yes". Let's see. Serial adulterer. Treats her husband like crap. Brought her husband on national television to humiliate him for money. How could her subconscious mind not think she was a good person?

Steven Speilberg had a fit of conscience by pulling out as adviser to the Beijing Olympics. China's response was to call it a "betrayal of the Olympic spirit". Right. China's idea of Olympic spirit is apparently locking up dissidents, doping athletes and dumping them when they get too old.

Here's an article that pissed me off. It is basically about how Viking women would wear an outfit that would emphasize their racks. That had me interested. But look at the picture that accompanied the article. I was expecting some big knockered Swedish woman with her assets hanging out. And that's what I got?

And in a final boob story. Natalie Portman told an interviewer that she wanted to get her mitts on Scarlett Johansson's breasts. Well, who doesn't?