Finally A News Update

I haven't had a chance to update. Time always gets short during football season. Hell next weekend I'm going to Pittsburgh to pull a double. Seeing Louisville versus Pitt on Saturday. Steelers and Colts on Sunday. Should be a fun trip even if I have to drive through West Virginia.

Just a reminder about next week. If you're voting for the wrong candidate, election day is Wednesday. If you're voting for the right one, it's on Tuesday. I get to open my precinct at 5:30am and spend all day there. Today's polls have shown the race has tightened up again (which could change tomorrow). That's not good for Obama because John McCain is running a terrible race. As I mentioned last week, it would be easy to pin the subprime problems on the Democratic party since their Congressional leadership was pushing affordable housing through Fannie Mae. McCain actually warned three years ago about the problem, while his opponent went another route. He was the second leading recipient of donations from Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac which is actually pretty impressive because that was since 1989 and he's only been in the Senate since he's only been there since 2005.

Another reason it's surprising it's close is that Obama is spending more money in two week periods than McCain can spend the entire general election. The question was who was all this money coming from and The Washington Post (shockingly to me) actually pointed out that the Obama campaign finance team has removed safeguards (like name matching or not allowing prepaid credit cards) from their internet donation system which might keep people who can't donate (maxed out donors, foreigners, etc) from continuing to pour cash into the campaign. It looks 2/3 of his money could be coming through the internet. Now, obviously that isn't all fraudulent, but if the $174K attributed to one woman who actually gave nothing is an indication, there is a lot of illegal cash in there. Now, I wonder if anyone, say back in the summer, mentioned that credit card donations under $200 via the internet were an opening to such financial fraud.

It's nice to see that UK is punishing a student for hanging an effigy of Obama. Just because effigies of candidates from both sides are being hung around the country without those people being arrested is no reason to think UK is exhibiting a double standard. Just because effigies have been a time honored political statement is no reason to think that this is a free speech issue because criticizing Barak Obama apparently doesn't fall under the First Amendment. Sometimes it might lead to government investigations against you if you question the Chosen One. Pardon me if I call BS on UK's reaction to this.

Well, enough about politics. Okay, one more story about politics, but a bipartisan one. The federal government is considering another bailout. This one of the ethanol industry. Why? They are hurt by volatile corn prices. Why are corn prices high? Government subsidies of ethanol has caused corn producers to sell more to ethanol producers which causes prices of corn to go up. Are friggin kidding me? A heavily subsidized industry is failing because of the subsidy so instead of killing the subsidy, the government is thinking of giving out more money? Again, are you friggin' kidding me?

Okay. These people are seriously messed up. A couple in New Mexico were picked up for child abuse. At first, it looked like a routine neglect story with the lack of any human amenities. Then it mentions that the house was full of caged rattlesnakes. If I had been the first responder, I would have gotten everyone out. Okay, I would have given them two minutes to get the Hell out. Then I would torched the place. God, I hate snakes.

Now, in Australia, a spider eats a bird. Let me repeat. A big ass spider catches a bird in its web and eats it. I admit that I have an irrational fear of snakes, but spiders generally don't bother me. As long as they aren't big enough to eat a bird. There would be a serious eradication effort in my back yard if I saw a spider eating a bird.

British women are whores. Which begs the question of why I'm here and not there. Oh yeah, it's in Europe. This is why I think Madonna fit in well in London, cheap British accent notwithstanding. Now, she's getting a divorce from Guy Ritchie who may get a buttload (atypical fiscal term) of money from her. Which I still think he deserves. After all, casting his untalented hag of a wife in a movie almost killed his career which is still on life support.

And Irish men are manwhores. Well, Bono might be. His picture with some bikini clad 19 year olds ended up on Facebook. Although looking at the picture, I have two thoughts. It doesn't look that bad. And he's a star. Couldn't he do better? That line from one of the girls had to be a kick in the balls - "For somebody who's much older than I am ........no thanks." Yeah, hanging out with a wealthy, famous man. What a drag. Hey honey, go back to taking facials from high school dropouts.

For an ad for a smell from Victoria's Secret, hottie Adriana Lima was wearing a $5 million bra. I could make the argument that it really isn't worth that because no one is stupid enough to actually pay that much for it. Or I could make the point that this is really a stupid promotion. But I admit I only linked to it because there is a picture of a hot chick in her underwear.

At a Swedish hockey game, the fans threw dildos on the ice to ridicule an opposing player. For one, I am appalled by this behavior. As mentioned in a previous posting, Sweden has state run pharmacies that sell sex toys. So, these fans were throwing state subsidized rubber wangs on the ice. If the state is going to provide low cost fake willies, they should expect it to be used properly.

A couple of dirty car stories. You know those rear view systems you can put on cars? Some guy in Canada had one and it would pick up porn on certain streets. And he's unhappy (sure he is). I notice the article doesn't mention which street it happens on. Probably doesn't want to be blamed for a traffic jam as a bunch of people with car cameras cruise the block. At least he knows proper behavior in public. Some guy in Michigan got busted for using a car wash vacuum as a sex toy. Here's a thought. Go to Walmart and buy a ShopVac.

Now, I find this story pretty damn sad. A woman is convicted for trying to pimp out her 17 year old daughter. She gets eighteen months. Think about it. Eighteen months for turning your teenage daughter into a whore. Yeah, thanks Mom. Would it have been more if her mom was peddling anal for her? Maybe she has another daughter who was 14 years old and ran off with some 28 year old guy. Probably not, but that's a great story about child raising. Your daughter is 14. She's hanging around a gambling website. She runs away with a guy twice her age she meets on the site. Maybe I need to start hanging around these sites......................I mean, this was appalling behavior on everyone's part.

You know, I read a lot of news, but the term "Fauxmosexuals" was a new one for me. At least until I saw a listing of the top 10 Fauxmosexuals. Apparently a lot of chick celebrities try to get attention by pretending to be lesbians because guys like it and it gets press. As a guy, I was offended by the notion until I remembered that I'd bought drinks for a girl after she made out with her female friend. And it's not like I watched the movie Bound for the plot. Still, I think the inclusion of Anne Heche made the article flawed. Not because she was faking her attraction to Ellen DeGeneres (I think anyone claiming attraction to Ellen is faking). I just don't think Heche is attractive herself so I think they could have found someone better. Now, there was something that was stunning in the part about Heche. It said Ellen was the only sorta-chick that she'd been with and all her other rolls in the hay were men. Including Lindsay Buckingham from Fleetwood Mac. Lindsay Buckingham was a dude?

John Daly is the man. The cops had to come pick his drunk ass up from a Hooters where he passed out at their bar. His popularity has always been based on him being just like the fans. I mean, who among us hasn't gotten so drunk at Hooters that an ambulance has to be called? I do like the fact that the article refers to him as a "recovering alcoholic". Might want to rethink using the term "recovering".

Fifteen pounds. That's how big the burger was some guy in Pennsylvania ate. After reading all the condiments on it, there's no way I could do that. I really don't like banana peppers. I wonder how far Clearfield is from Pittsburgh.

Bailout and Other Stuff

I guess $700 billion doesn't go as far as it used to. Congress passes a $700 billion bailout to stabilize the stock market. The stock market plummets. I wonder how that could happen. Oh, right. The government came up with a plan to fix a problem that began with government meddling in the economy. No reason for that to cause a confidence crisis. For years, the government has pushed the mortgage industry into approving non-credit worthy people for loans so they came up with subprime loans which worked as long as housing prices kept going up. What could go wrong with that? Well, mortgages get bundled into securities and sold or used as collateral. This do fine unless there is a high default rate (relative since we're only talking about 4% of loans defaulting). So, if housing prices fall, you get more defaults which leads to the securities becoming toxic. That means no one knows how many defaulted loans are in the securities so they lose all value and become "illiquid" (companies holding them can't do crap with them). Now, the government's idea isn't a straight up bailout (cash payment) or even a Chrysler/AIG bailout (loans to be repaid. The idea is that the government buys those securities at an auction (at a discounted rate most likely). That injects "liquidity" back into the credit markets. The government then pores over the securities to find what the "value" should be and sells them back to the market. Since they can buy them cheap, the idea that the government might make money off the deal isn't completely out of the realm of possibility (although I wouldn't bet on it). Simplistic explanation and probably not completely accurate (it's a complicated issue).

So, why isn't it working? Who knows. I didn't think it was a good idea. To begin with, there's philosophy. It isn't the government's responsibility to make sure you buy a house you can't afford. Nor is it to make sure everyone "wins". If you take the risks out of the system, it becomes stagnant. Also, Congress was trying to load all kinds of crap in it like allowing the government to take equity in the banks or investment firms if the securities couldn't be resold for a profit. Not to mention an assload of pork. Trust me, having the federal government (the people who make laws and regulations) owning stock in the people they make laws and regulations over could lead to conflicts of interest since they won't own stock in all of them. Another problem is whether or not you believe some minor government bureaucrat will do a better job valuing these securities over someone paid a lot to do it. I don't. But I also don't believe banks will suddenly stop loaning money if the bailout doesn't happen. They may start looking at credit scores (which they should have been doing all along), but banks don't make money if they don't loan money. Now, the biggest problem I had with it was seeing the same people who for years covered for the semi-government organizations (Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac) and pushed for bad loans were now the ones "leading the way" to fix the problem. Especially when one was buggering a Fannie Mae exec while covering for them.

That would be like the chairman of the Ways & Means Committee (they write tax laws) not knowing the tax laws governing himself. Oh, wait......... Although, maybe Charlie Rangel can help AIG pay back their government loans since he got $10 million from AIG for his little narcissistic vanity project, a "center for public service" named after him which should be closed due to fraud.

But Rangel is safe. He's in New York. That's the city where the thought of Sarah Palin has led to general insanity, freakouts, murderous psychosis and possibly yeast infections in city women. Yet, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (who is President of a country that kills women for adultery, gays for ......gayness, and in his dreams Jews for Jewishness) gets a warm welcome there.

Speaking of government stupidity, here's another example of why Johnny Can't Read. A fourth grader was suspended for two days for having a razor blade. Mainly the miniature razor blade that is part of a kiddie pencil sharpener. His pencil sharpener was broken so he used the little piece of metal to sharpen his pencil. The school called the police and then did the suspension. Great quote from someone with the district, "we're always going to do something to make sure the child understands the seriousness of having something that could potentially harm another student, but we're going to be reasonable." Reasonable? Are you completely retarded? Calling the cops and suspending a 10 year old for a little shard of metal is reasonable? A pencil is more dangerous than that piece of metal. Get out of the education field, moron, because you are too stupid to be any help at all.

How did I miss this?

Paul McCartney recently played a concert in Israel. It made news because they were banned from playing back in 1965. My assumption was a fear by the Israelis that they would have to listen to the inane lyrics of I Want To Hold Your Hand, but it may have been something else. Oh, it was also news because a Muslim wackjob threatened to have McCartney killed if he played the show (although I suspect it's out of anger that he didn't bring the rest of Wings with him).

In a related story, the Muslim wackjob has a daughter in London. She's a stripper. Probably not a very good one since she's also on the public dole.

Must be something in the water in London. Two Swedish sisters (yeah, that's why I clicked the link) kept running into traffic on a British highway. And laughably inept traffic cops couldn't seem to stop them. Don't they have tasers in England? If not for the damage they'd do to the cars' front end, I say let them have at it.

At least it'd be better than what this pervert was up to. He was arrested for having sex with a car. And in such a strange way. I would have assumed going for the tailpipe, but he seem enamored with the grill which may say something about what he was packing. They feel the need to point out he was drunk. You know, I've been drunk a few times myself. I don't remember trying to stick my wang into a some part of a car.

Some European Union women's rights committee with too much time on their hand wants to ban any advertising that might reinforce gender stereotypes. Does that mean they shouldn't use women in lipstick commercials because it might lead people to think women are the main buyers of lipstick? Some Swedish prude (my guess is she's the only ugly Swede) is making a big deal. My response? Get a life, bitch.

There are certain things that even I would never consider doing. I think stealing the puppy of a 10 year old with cancer is one of them. The fact that the thieves might have known he had cancer is probably a one way ticket to Hell.

Playboy is laying off staff due to not having any money. The article blames it on the "global economic turmoil". BS. You can find hardcore pornography on the internet. Do you really need to spend your money on a bunch of lame articles mixed in with airbrushed pictures? I read somewhere else (I'm too lazy to look it up) that most of the revenue for the company comes from merchandising rather than magazine. I'm sure they got something from Girls Next Door which probably won't do too well with all his women leaving. Well, I'm sure he can find some more girls with low self-esteem who are willing to suffer a drooling geriatric's egomania to trade their dignity for a chance at long lasting fame that isn't likely to happen.

A new trend seems to be women trying to sell their virginity for big bucks. I realize a legal age virgin is a rarity, but is it really worth that much money? The latest is an Italian model who wants to use the money for acting lessons. If she can convince someone that she's really a virgin but is willing to sell it, she doesn't need acting lessons. I like how her brother defends such a ridiculous story by saying his sister is a "devout Catholic". That's funny. I just assumed she was a whore.